I read a quote on the blog of another that I’ve been thinking about… the quote comes from flylady.net (who I have much to learn from) and it says:

“Keep in mind, you are not behind: you are just getting started. I don’t want you to try to catch up, I just want you to jump in where you are.”

That really covers a bunch of things doesn’t it?  Pretty much every thing in my life.   There are things I wish I did more of… like stitch more, clean more, and even write more, even if it is just to document my journey along this meandering path of motherhood and wife-hood, of life in all its array.  So, I guess that’s what I’m doing here, while at the same time I’m listening to my washing machine spin upstairs, and while I’m smelling the zucchini bread bake in the oven… it really has been a productive day, including things such as a nap, laundry, changing Adair and Alec’s sheets…. all the things that may seem mundane, but really, they gave me some sanity today.

I’m 38.  I have more than 38 lbs. to lose, I have less than $38 in my bank account, and I have a list of 38 other things I should be doing right now.  But, I’m not behind, in fact, I’m just getting started, and I don’t have to catch up, I just need to jump in where I am.

Where is that exactly?

I’m not really sure…

somewhere between here and there…

but in the middle of now.

I’m not behind, I’m just getting started, I don’t have to catch up, I just need to jump in where I am.

There is something soothing about repeating that… it’s comforting. It removes pressure from outside forces, and it brings me to now… to today… to what I have control of… which is this minute and where I choose to go from here. I don’t really know if I even have to have a destination? I think it’s all about the jumping in and allowing the moment to settle me, and removes the sense that I’m behind before I ever think if getting started.

I’m not behind, I’m just getting started, I don’t have to catch up, I just need to jump in where I am.