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A friend of mine told me a while back that God not only wants my heart, but that He gives me the freedom to dream with Him. I asked “like what?” and with a chuckle my friend said there is no limit. The reason for this is that when He gave us a new heart and made us a new creation in Him, He enacted freedom within us. Part of freedom is that we are able to release everyday masks that we wear, released to pursue pleasure (not in the perverted sense, but pleasure and freedom to live new in Him). We are free indeed to live life more abundantly! In dreaming with God, we have the opportunity to see ourselves as God sees us! God’s desire for our heart is to live overwhelmed everyday, and our heart is where our flame is and also where our dreams are!

So… what do I dream about? I dream a lot about my husband and kids knowing in their heart that they are treasures to God…. and to have that be their first thought when they wake up, and the last thought on their mind before they fall asleep. I dream about living more actively for Christ, walking more boldly and telling others about His awesome love for them and how they are more than treasures to Him!!! I dream of going to massage therapy school and having a career to sooth the aches and pains of others, while I also see myself in my heart praying for that person in tandem to massage. I dream of hearing and recognizing His voice and heart speaking to me, and being able to distribute that as living water like He first intended. I dream… I dream… I dream…… so many things that I don’t even have the words to describe the feelings that catapult to life.

My friend’s words echo in my heart, “when you dream with God, things around you take their rightful place, at the feet of God and you change your focus on God’s Kingdom with pillars of overwhelming love.”

Dare yourself to dream WITH God. What does it do to you?

The reflections in your book are wide and full.. thanks for coming back.

With the election soon approaching, this is a great site to keep a watch on: Current Electoral Vote Predictor 2004. I find it interesting that a candidate can hold the popular vote, but still not get the electoral vote. Check out this site for all your electoral vote questions.

Then, I heard about vote-pairing on my local news, with a link to this site “Pair the Vote”, for people who want to try to get around the electorate.

Very interesting.

We went to Switchfoot last night, very cool. More than cool. Lots of college students in attendance, many if not most, were Mormon, but they were singing along, and loudly. I pray for the message to penetrate into their hearts and cause them to further seek the Father’s heart alone, outside of their “gospel.”

It was loud and rich.

I got this in an email… it’s hysterical.

How To Clean Your Toilet – The Fun Way
Toilet_cat

Instructions on how to clean your toilet
1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.
2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.
3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. You may need to stand on the lid.
4. The cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this.
5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a “power-wash” and rinse”.
6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.
7. Stand behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift both lids.
8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.
9. Both the commode and the cat will be sparkling clean.
Sincerely,
The Dog
The_dog_2

.

I wish I had come across this while I was a college student buying Ramen noodles in bulk. Would have been nice for some variation… check out the ways you never thought you could cook up Ramen… :Ramen Recipe Database

My little boy sounds like he has swallowed a kazoo. He caught some kind of bug that has given him a scratchy voice and a consistant gurgle in the back of his throat when he breaths. For an adult, this wouldn’t be so bad, as we know well how to clear our throats… but he’s only three, and doesn’t quite have that aquired skill. Oh, what we take for granted. So, in the meantime, when he’s breathing through his mouth, it sounds like he’s blowing a kazoo. :)

Two cool things to mention… one, I’m a big Clint Eastwood fan… the spagetti westerns are awesome, so, check out this site for the cool opening song to The Good, The Bad & The Ugly… click the link, click Clint’s face, click Film Music, scroll down till TGTBTU and select the first one… then turn up the volume. Think of this song anytime you need some theme music for your day or attitude. ;)

The next cool thing is Da Jesus Book, it’s the New Testament translated in Hawaiian Pidgen talk (slang). My step-dad is Hawaiian, so he spoke pidgen often around the house, even though he graduated with a MS from UCLA in Civil Engineering. It’s an awesome way to get another look at the Word.

Check out a couple examples:
Rom. 3:25:
Fo Da Rome Peopo 3:25: God wen make Jesus da main guy, so he can be da sacrifice for hemo da shame fo all da bad kine stuff everybody do, ony if dey go trus him and dey shua dat he wen go bleed an mahke for dem. Dass how God show dat he make everyting come right.”

Or, how about John 3:16,
John 3:16: God wen get so plenny love an aloha for da peopo inside da world, dat he wen send me, his one an ony Boy, so dat everybody dat trus me no get cut off from God, but get da real kine life dat stay to da max foeva. You know, God neva send me, his Boy, inside da world for punish da peopo. He wen send me fo take da peopo outqa da bad kine stuff dey doing.”

And if you want to know “wat da Bible say bout important stuffs” click and find out.

Deeper ties to the body of Christ have become a reoccuring thought for me lately. So far, I think I’ve just been putting my feet in the water, instead of really getting wet and trying to swim. A while ago, God introduced me to a thought to consider, and it has resurfaced in more thoughts and discussions, which I’ve had with others in the last week. It’s one thing to be involved in activities at church, after all, I’m a Cubbie leader for Awanas, I head the prayer chain, I do some office things at church, and I also go to a Sunday school class… but those aren’t really revealing the deeper parts of me, on a day in day out basis.

What about deeper relationships? What about accountability? Accountability is a word that when I hear, I find myself raising my eyebrows and widening my eyes with shock, in a way that expresses the thought “ARE YOU CRAZY?!? TOTALLY INSANE???” When I hear it and look at it, it has vulnerability written all over it, and that really clashes with my sense of self-sufficiency.

But… God, good ol’ God, says “…so in Christ, we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others.” Rom. 12:5. What kind of insane idea is this? I am not supposed to stand independant of the others???? Are you sure? *this can’t be right* Why is it that I’ve grown up feeling the opposite? The feelings that I have stuffed into the recesses of my heart for self protection should not have been stuffed there??? We are supposed to share our joys and griefs, and let everyone either rejoice in the joy, or suffer with us in our grief. Interdependancy.

I need to get it in my head that accountability is not confrontation and judging. I need to see it as a tool that God has designed for me to have someone who will support, counsel, understand, encourage, and edify me, as well as warn or challenge me along the way. Someone to come clean to besides God….

I know I withhold more than a lot from my blog, and myself through rationalizing. But you can’t do that with a real person in front of you, who has favor and a purpose to speak into your life. God is way bringing me deeper into a place to approach this… and over time, my fear is lessening, but I’m still confused as to how to approach someone to begin a relationship like this. Prereqs? Requirements? Confidentiality agreements? LOL! A friend shared some suggestions with me, to: be patient, be deliberate, be vulnerable, be real and go beneath the surface, be willing, and be teachable. I know the real reason to focus on a relationship like this is for my growth, directed by the Holy Spirit. It’s just scary.

Obsession…. David Crowder Band

What can I do with my obsession
With the things I cannot see
Is there madness in my being
Is it the wind that moves the trees?
Sometimes You’re further than the moon
Sometimes You’re closer than my skin
And You surround me like a winter fog
You’ve come and burned me with a kiss

Chorus:
And my heart burns for You
And my heart burns…for You

And I’m so filthy with my sin
I carry pride like a disease
You know I’m stubborn, Lord, and
I’m longing to be close
You burn me deeper than I know
And I feel lonely without hope
And I feel desperate
Without vision
You wrap around me like a winter coat
You come and free me like bird

Chorus

Today’s Slice of Infinity spoke so much today. It explained in a way that sometimes we need to sink, in order to realize there is nothing we can do than be saved by the grip and grace of Jesus.

Betsy Childs writes “A Twofold Hope”:

I have two contrasting pictures in my mind of what it means to live the Christian life. One is a picture of victory, of empowerment, of unwavering faith. The other is a picture of forgiveness and grace that is undeserved, of acceptance even in the face of failure. I have lived both pictures. I know that it is possible to truly walk by faith, to stand in unwavering conviction that God will keep his promises. I also know that far too often my faith fails and I sink into doubt and anxiety.

Both of these pictures come together in one scene in Matthew 14. Jesus’ disciples are in a boat on the sea, sailing against the wind, when he comes to them by walking on the water. Jesus gives Peter the permission and power to walk out on the sea to meet him. But in the midst of the miracle, Peter gets distracted by the wind; as he becomes afraid he starts to sink. Jesus stands strong, holding on to Peter and pulling him back into the boat.

In just a few short minutes, Peter manifests great faith and debilitating doubt. Both serve as opportunities for Jesus to reveal something about himself. As he enabled Peter to walk on the water, Peter knew the awesome power of God as he had never known it. But in being rescued by Jesus, Peter understood the tender compassion of God even for those of little faith. Michael Card comments, “I think that the point is that Peter needed to sink. If he’d walked to Jesus, I’m sure he would have been very self-congratulatory. He needed to sink, just like you and I need to sink.” (1)

In Peter’s victory and in his rescue, the glory belonged to Christ. Peter didn’t save himself by grabbing hold of Jesus; Jesus held a firm grasp on Peter. It is a manifestation of God’s work in us when we are able to stand strong, and it is God’s grip that keeps us when we lose our focus and our footing. Songwriter Rich Mullins expressed this twin hope:

If I stand, let me stand on the promise
That you will pull me through
If I can’t, let me fall on the grace
That first brought me to you.

When you experience a season of victory and fruitfulness in your Christian walk, do not forget that we are entirely dependent on the strength that God provides. We must not become so enamored with walking on water that we take our eyes off of Jesus. And in those times when you do take yours eyes off of him, and you feel yourself sinking, do not give up hope. All is not lost. When we fall into God’s grace, we remember that Christ is both the Author and Finisher of our faith, and we will never cease to need him.

It really blows my mind when God confirms things, even if they are just mere thoughts journaled out on paper. I was in my Sunday school class, “Walking in the Spirit,” and today we were doing part in our book and part in a tape series by James MacDonald, who just rocks (what would it be like to be in his congregation every Sunday?). Anyway, before we start, we always have some time for individual quiet prayer, then group prayer. In my silent prayer, I specifically asked God to speak loudly to me today, because I’ve been having a lot of questions around the issue of recieving being a new creature in Him (2 Cor. 5:17-21). While I have been asking these questions I think I’ve been elsewhere when He’s been answering, or… He has waited until now to answer. I asked to hear undeniably from Him.

So, after we started, we talked a little bit then started the tape, and on it, I was literally being blown away with MacDonald describing an anology that was almost identical to what I had written in my notebook back on September 14th. Hearing it made my heart start pounding after the initial shock that it sounded like something I’d thought of, then I flipped over in my notebook while still listening, and read what I wrote, and my jaw dropped, as I saw what I wrote and compared it to what I was hearing. It just blows me away how and when God works like that….. I have a lot to go over with Him in prayer and in processing what I heard today, what I had written, along with some Scripture references that I hadn’t reflected on yet.

+++Rock my world God, twist my current head and heart knowledge into a new shape, transform it into a more efficient, usable, and fresh translation of my new heart alligned to Your own. I desire to recieve fully and live fully the Spirit and gifts you have gifted me with. Lord, take me for a ride at 120 mph where I literally feel like my cheeks will be frozen in a smile from excitment and astonishment. Take my self, as I continually discover how to die to it, in order that I can live daily anew and alive only with Christ in me. Thank You Lord, in Christ’s precious and holy name, Amen.+++

You know what that is don’t you??? Any guesses???

It’s the best place to sleep on our aging king size matress… you know, it’s the spot that is the origional matress that no one regularly sleeps on. It’s like new, with barely any body imprints, and I didn’t know about it until a few months ago when Mike said, “this is the best spot.” I’m so glad he shared the information. The problem is that I can’t sleep on it when Mike is still in bed, otherwise the wingspan I have to have with my arms as I hold my pillow while I sleep on my stomach gets in his way. Luckily for me, there is a time when I do get to sleep on it… on the days that Mike gets up for work at 3:51am. Somehow on those days I just wake up there. I must just slide over until I’m sleeping on the comfy spot.

I guess it’s a sign that we should get a new matress in the near future. Imagine the comfort and sweet dreams I’d have. aaahhh….. until then, thank God for the hump in the bed.

Sittin back today, taking it all in. Another day in the Lord, and I’m curled up on His lap. The weather is perfect outside and the kids and I have already been to the park and I expect I would be the best mom in the world if this afternoon entailed the same thing. So, guess that’s what we’ll do, I’ll put my shades on and read while they climb, slide, and giggle the afternoon away.

I have a lot of thoughts going on with God, some in divergant directions, while others are crossing paths as I understand more and more. There are some things going on that are taking shape, and although the outlook looks good, the process appears difficult. I trust fully in Him, and I will continue to do so, even in the midst of my trials, I know through Him I will persevere. I’m filled with hope and just reflecting on the things of God. I am His beloved….

There is a girl who has been going to my church for some time now, and we’ve said “hi” and been friends while at church, but haven’t really developed a friendship outside of church the activities included in it. Just recently we’ve been visiting on the phone and have dropped some things by eachothers houses that have to do with church, and during those times, my heart has warmed in being able to converse with her so freely and to feel her as a sister in Christ.

Within the last week, we’ve visited much more, and today we are meeting in the park so our kids can play while we have more time to talk. I’m so encouraged to see God bringing me another friend who is a believer, in this valley that is so predominantly Mormon. What kindeling to my heart to know that today we have a divine appointment to build on the others that God has arranged for us.

Guess what? Switchfoot is coming to our small way Mormon town in concert next Thursday. Yep, I’m going! A bunch of us are going… and my heart is melting for people to hear God’s heart in their lyrics.

Maybe part of my fear or inability to pray boldly, loudly, and to feel free to dream with God, are founded in unbelief or disbelief of what God IS capable of. Not out of rebellion mind you, but just the immaturity of my heart in places. hmmm….

I’m in several books right now, picking up whichever is closest when I have a few minutes… some get left on my bedside at night, and during the day my daughter naps in my bed, so I can’t easily go and pick up where I left off the night before. So today, I had “Intercessory Prayer” by Dutch Sheets, closest to me which I’ve been wanting to get into, but so far this was my first opportunity.

In my current season, I’m feeling called repeatedly to prayer, yet at the same time, I sometimes feel so unequipped to answer the call because I don’t have a vocabulary to express what I truly want. Or actually, now that I stop to think about it, maybe I am just afraid of asking in boldness, or asking for things in my right mind I dare not even imagine. I limit myself, and worse yet, I limit God by not trusting Him enough to pray loud and hard. I think my prayers are affected by my small mind struggeling to grasp the reaches of prayer. How much should I ask? How far should I let my imagination go with the lead of the Holy Spirit to be swept away with a prayer that is alive with desire and love? Not only do the reaches of prayer confuse me, but so does the persistancy. What does it mean to be persistant in prayer? I’m sure that I have never been truly persistant… but I’m so willing to learn. In this book, Sheets says “A lack of endurance is one of the greatest causes of defeat, especially in prayer. We don’t wait well. We’re into microwaving; God on the other hand, is usually into marinating.” I am quite sure that if I was truly persistant and prevailed in prayer, I’d be a witness to a remarkable work by God. I want to learn to have endurance in prayer, and I want to learn to challange God with my prayers! Can I overwhelm the Father with my love for those He has placed in my path? Perseverance in prayer is a commitment to all the causes the Spirit leads my heart to, but am I ready for that? Am I capable of that?

In my struggle to understand persisting in prayer, I spoke with my close friend who encouraged me. She said that every new day presents new opportunities to breathe new prayers to God, and that He is always delighted to hear a new call to Him. Even with the “same” prayer from the day before, it’s our freshly inclined heart to His that He recognizes and honors, so our prayers are never the same to His ears, they always hold fresh intentions on our part to bring in supplication to Him our concerns for all things in His Kingdom.

I’m learning a lot… and I see that some of it, I’m learning over, even though I think I may have just thought I’d learned it a little while ago. But it’s like it’s all new, or maybe it’s not new, just a new angle that I had no idea existed. : D So many facets, so little time eh?

Tom at Effortless Grace speaks life, free from God’s heart. In his post on The Comparison Game my interest got captured because of the lure of football news, because I’m a fan and haven’t been acting like it because I’ve been busy with other “priorities.” ; )

Anyway, I wasn’t expecting where Tom was going… but then right there in the fifth paragraph he follows up his digesting of comparison with this…

“It is a chasing after the wind, with an ever-climbing performance bar, one that just as you think you are about to clear it, raises itself again. Brothers and sisters, we are not to compare ourselves with anything, or anyone, for who or what can compare with the Beloved of God? Can mountains? Can birds? Can the most beautiful ocean compare? Can an eagle soaring at its wondrous height compare to the beloved of God? Nothing compares to the love of God, which He has freely bestowed upon us. We are His children, and we are above all comparison.”

How awesome to be reminded of that… especially on one of those days where I feel like every ounce of anything lovely has been sucked away, and where I start to doubt in myself, my faith, and my life. I sometimes forget how live in the new heart Christ has given me, because I shift my attention to fear, or insecurity, or just withdrawing to my shell and seeking to redisover how to retreat to God’s embrace.

I’m learning daily how to be. Be what? Me. A disciple. A wife. A mother. A friend. A daughter. A listener. A supporter. A dreamer. A lover. A homemaker. So many things…. and all of them daily, I’m just learning how to be. Again and again, I’m relearning, because He’s growing me. Thanks for reminding me Tom that to Him, I am His beloved, and I don’t need to compare myself with anyone. Why is it so hard for me to remember that only He has the ability to love me like I am His most favorite of all?

Ever heard of that? That’s what my mom calls it when the man of the house starts acting moody. I guess it’s supposed to be the male equivalent to when women use the excuse(?) of hormones or pms. I don’t know. Either way, you know the reason why I bring it up. My “better half” doesn’t seem so agreeable or pleasant today. Spiritual warfare? Possibly. Memnones? Could be. The moon? Who knows. Maybe he’s feeling the sympathetic effects of Mt. St. Helen’s. You never know. Sadly, it’s when I’m so confused and mindboggled that I am least likely to pray, when in all reality, that is the first thing I should do. Pray for my dh… but I don’t know what to pray for other than to ask God to see his heart and the causes of the mood swing… and to process it with him, in a way that he finds release from whatever it is that has gripped his behavior. I can easily pray for myself, but it’s not really about me… I should really leave myself out of the equation, except for asking the Spirit to convict me of anything I may have done to contribute to the attitude.

One of those days, thankfully it’s nearly done.

A close friend of mine is quickly approaching the due date of her fourth child coming this Saturday. I spent most of Saturday helping her to do her “once a month cooking” where you prepare all dinner meals in one day and then freeze them. She is someone that I treasure as a friend, so I just enjoyed spending the day with her, and the fact that I was ministering to her at the same time by helping her get her months worth of food was a bonus. I couldn’t have done it without my husband saying that he’d take care of Adair and Alec all day, so I am praying for God to mightely bless Mike for also ministering to my friend by letting me be available.

On top of all that cooking, I also canned more salsa! My neighbor brought a HUGE bag of tomatoes, so I canned 20 pints of salsa. She told me to expect more tomatoes in another week, so I guess I’ll have plenty of salsa for the winter, provided I don’t keep giving it away ; )

I am reading a book called “God’s Timing for Your Life,” by Dutch Sheets and I’m finding that I’m rereading a lot to not only try to understand what it means, but to also evaluate what my thoughts have been. This is illuminating much about my walk with God, and His purposes for the way He unfolds things through time for me. One of the first things that I am trying to wrap my hand around is His desire for us to understand our newness in Him.

Sheets goes into detail about the language used in three verses in Isaiah about God’s timing and transition into new seasons.

Isaiah 48:6
“You have heard; look at all this.
And you, will you not declare it?
I proclaim to you new things from this time,
Even hidden things which you have not known.

Isaiah 43:19
“Behold, I will do something new,
Now it will spring forth;
Will you not be aware of it?
I will even make a roadway in the wilderness,
Rivers in the desert.

Isaiah 42:9
“Behold, the former things have come to pass,
Now I declare new things;
Before they spring forth I proclaim them to you.”

Sheets describes that the phrase “springs forth” in the last two verses is describing a shift in time. God is asking us “Will you not be aware of it?” How much is God revealing to us, that we are not aware of in the moments we recieve? Is it because our gaze is distracted and it causes us to not recognize, or is it that God reveals it to us when we are ready to understand?

After we see the springing forth, the author calls us to notice the word “new,” which also speaks of a coming shift. What was interesting was that in the New Testament, two Greek words are translated “new,” despite their different meanings. The explanation of the meanings opens up a lot for me.

“The word neos means numerically new but not different.” Sheets gives the example of a brand new car of a certain make and model, which although is a new car, it’s not unique, because there were thousands of the same year, make, and model of car that were produced. Then, “the other Greek word for “new” is kainos, which means not only numerically new but also qualitatively new.” So, what this means like comparing a new car made today to a Model T years and years ago. The new car is not only numerically new, but qualitatively new because it’s different.

When we look at the different definitions of these two words – neos and kainos is important to understanding Scripture. 2 Cor. 5:17 says that we are new (kainos) creations in Christ. Not duplications, or replicas of something else, which would be neos. We are new in a completely different way, like a Porshe to a Model T. Sheets says, “We are new creations- brand-new in kind and quality. God has put a different nature in us, transformed us and put the power of His Spirit in us. When we’re born again, we’re not just the same people with a few changes; we are kainos- brand-new on the inside.

In Matthew 9:17 we find that Jesus used both of the Greek words in one statement. “Neither do men pour new (neos) wine into old wineskins. If they do, the skins will burst, the wine will run out and the wineskins will be ruined. No, they pour new wine into new (kainos) wineskins, and both are preserved.” This new wine of the Spirit is not different, but more of the same, because the Holy Spirit can’t change or improve qualitatively. The Spirit desires to put more of Himself into us- numerically new wine. The wine isn’t different, it is the wineskin that needs to change, to be kainos, qualitatively new, in order to get another dose of His Spirit poured into us. Sheets describes that, “we must be transformed and changed from one stage to another. If we don’t become different- qualitatively new- we won’t be able to hold the new wine He is pouring out. We will miss this new “time.” So… the crux is that, “in order for God to prepare us for the new season, He changes us.”

So, it’s like a lobster (even though I think he meant to say crab, or do lobsters really abandon their shells?), and how they have to leave their shells in order to grow. So it’s a quandry, they need the shells to protect them, but the need to leave their shells to find bigger ones so that they can continue to grow. The dangerous time for them is when they are between shells, where they are left vulnerable to the currents, predators, and environmental hazards. So we, like some lobsters (crabs?), need to change to grow, and shed our shells, structure, comfort zones, etc. that we’ve depended on, and leave them behind as we explore becoming new with Christ.

lots more to come… on the divine shift, renewal, and joining of the seasons.

 

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